Yadda yadda yadda...

Several weeks ago at the end of a fun filled weekend, I sat drunk happy outside my house with my roomie after we went to a un-birthday/crawfish feed party. Life seemed great. Then very randomly, out of the complete blue JAK, a guy that I haven’t spoken with in about six years, text messaged me.

JAK and I went to high school together and were constantly the couple that wasn’t. My high school and post-high school boyfriends detested JAK- although we never dated, he was always there. I loved him. I guess he was my first love and heart break. He still doesn’t know this. He crushed my heart when, at nineteen, he broke the news to me that a girl that he had (I thought randomly) been seeing was pregnant and they were going to get married. I cried for two days. He knew of not one tear.

So here he was, back on my phone. The words “How are you? It’s JAK” brightly illuminating the night on my cell. My heart raced. How did he even get my phone number? I couldn’t even answer him. I consulted one of my two best friends from high school immediately, Hot Momma. Hot Momma told me to call him, find out what he wanted. My hands were shaking. I do not do this. I do not get this worked-up over boys, but somehow I was immediately transported back to being a sixteen year old self-conscious girl. I don’t even live in the same state as JAK, what does it even matter?

I called him and spoke with him briefly, finding out that he had been good, in the middle of a career change, just going through some life changes (read: yadda yadda yadda- don’t fail me now and forget your Seinfeld episodes). It was a brief but nice conversation. He told me he’d call me back. I then strictly adhered to the crazy girls rule, and over analyzed every moment of the short phone call.

He didn’t call.

I wondered what I had said in a five minute span that would scare someone off like that. I called one time a few days later, when I received no response, I gave up. So not worth the energy, pursuing someone who won’t call you. I do not care how busy someone is: If they want to call you, they’ll find the time.

Flash to a couple of days ago and too many bottles of wine over at JPs house. I began my drunk dialing (I really, really do need a breathalyzer attached to my phone, thus eliminating the regretful call-log review the morning after). Thinking “what the hell?” when I saw his name, I hit send. Some fifty-year-old-smoker-sounding lady answered the phone- not too sweetly and handed it off to him. What ensued was two hours of initially hearing them fight, and then him rant about jail time, court appearances and the psycho 19 (not 50)-year-old girlfriend he was living with. He went on and on so, that I had JP take the phone as I got ready for bed and he never realized that I wasn’t the ‘uh-huh’ on the other end.

I got off the phone with him, laughed with JP about how crazy that was, and received a follow-up text that night from him about how good it was for him to talk to me. He sent another text the following day about he couldn’t wait to see me when I came to town. Are you fucking joking me??? I don’t think so.

He’s called a couple of times since. He should learn that regardless of how busy a person is- if they want to call they will.

I am glad, however, to find out that I wasn’t the reason he didn’t call...