Lessons of an OCG

I learned some important things this weekend.

The first and foremost is that my sister is not one who shares reliable information. No engagement was had. All the hoopla and picture taking surrounding my mother’s Christmas party was nothing more than my mother going overboard with a simple holiday white-elephant gift exchange. Joyous.

My sister learned that the photographer that my mom hired for her Christmas party was the same one that had been the photographer for her wedding. My sister was embarrassed that she and her husband had gotten divorced this last year… I told her that she shouldn’t be embarrassed. The photographer would be stoked to know she was dating someone else… more potential future money for him… (maybe he offers package discounts…)

I learned that my mother will now get drunk occasionally… and in doing so, if you walk away from the dinner table to get your check from the waitress, your intoxicated mother will pull her boyfriend towards her in some gross kissing his ear manner… causing me to want to vomit almost as much as the German-shit-eating-porn I was subjected to the previous weekend.

I also learned an easy way to make money. (Not that!) Have your friends forget that you will do almost any dare… have them throw in some cash to back up their challenge… and… done. You have a bit more money filling your pockets.

Leaving Pioneer Place on Saturday afternoon with JP a large crowd had gathered outside of the doors we were exiting, watching one street performer painted completely in silver stand erectly still and a man beat rhythms onto over turned buckets. JP looked at me and said, “I bet you wouldn’t dance out through the crowd to the corner.”

Smiling, I replied, “How much?”

“Twenty dollars.”

I opened the doors and got down, shaking my groove thang out into the open space and through the crowd. That’ll be $20, fuckyouverymuch.

I also learned of a band, “Left Hand Smoke” my new fav bandujour. From Seattle they played in Portland on Saturday night. They have a song called “Annie” in which they changed to instead sing “OCG” while I danced solo in front of the stage… I hadn’t intended to dance solo as I thought JP would be returning to dance… or any of the 15 people we were with… when none of them returned to the dance floor, I began to exit as a drunk woman sitting down grabbed my arm and said, “Oh no you don’t, and pushed me back onto the floor.” It was odd… but I danced a bit more… prior to scooting out behind her turned back. I also invited the band to come to perform a concert at my house… Brilliant (although it would be cool, what was I thinking?) Have another drink OCG.

The Spanker came and joined us later that evening… Sadly I have no more haught (hot + naughty) stories to share of him at this time… I declined the invitation to stay the night with him… am I mellowing out and becoming a good girl?

Wow I do learn something new about myself everyday…