Just another day in paradise...

"Erections, Ejaculation, Exhibitions, and General Tales of Ordinary Madness" -Charles Bukowski

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

A Day in the Life…

Having had a “real” job for years, I haven’t had as much free time available during the day as I have had since I left Laguna. Most Some people might fill up their time with important activities, such as housework or going to the gym. I am not one of those people. I have, however, found things important to me to do to consume my time.

I am not one of those people who sleep the day away. I am generally awake between eight and nine in the morning, even when working late the night before. Sure, part of this has to do with Beach Chic calling me nearly every morning bright and early, but mostly I hate sleeping my day away.

I have found TV is a fabulous way to waste the day away. Sometimes for the worst. I refuse to watch any “talk shows”. I didn’t even know that Jerry Springer or Maury Provich were still on TV until last week. It’s comforting to know that poor parenting will ensure a television slot for that style of show for years to come. As far as I am concerned they are much too stressful for me to even watch a moment of.

I have instead become addicted to The History Channel. My days have been filled with historical information from everything about the history of nails (did you know that settlers moving west would burn down their houses so they could they could salvage the nails, as they were such a precious commodity?), to distilled spirits and beer, to the Mongols and Vikings, to now watching “Opus Dei, Unveiled”.

Here TLC and The History Channel are next to one another. During most of the programs I watch “A Baby Story” is being featured on repeat on the neighboring station. I will occasionally flip the station over. This has led to a slow evolution (ok, it only took about a week) into being too horrified into never having children.

It started off seeing a small moment when a woman was in the throes of giving birth. Later talking to EB, I made it clear that I will be having a c-section (keeps the flower tight anyway, so he had no arguments). Then today a woman was describing in detail exactly how a contraction felt… I think adoption is a beautiful idea.

This afternoon I grabbed the hula hoop I bought last week and decided to give it a whirl. I used to be able to spend hours hula hooping. I warmed up by moving my waist and hips in an alternating circular motion, stepped into the center of the hoop, and gave it a spin … only to watch the hula hoop wind its way down to the floor. With a few more practice spins, I actually got it to stay up for a bit. And by “a bit” I mean maybe ten seconds. I will get it down (or, rather, get it to stay up), I swear. And someone told me I would hurt myself. Pishaw.

As you can see, I am being very productive with all of this free time I have during my days… I don’t know how I will possibly fit school into my daily schedule beginning next week. Perhaps I should rethink my priorities. After all, The History Channel is quite educational.


  • At 6/21/2006 06:49:00 PM, Blogger Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said…

    Don't give up with the Hula Hoop. Pretty soon you'll have two spinning around your arms and one around your kneck. I'll be expecting a video of that on your blog.

  • At 6/22/2006 06:18:00 AM, Anonymous circe said…

    OCG--that was a very interesting snippet about the nails and the houses from the History Channel. I seldom watch TV but I catch TBC with the History Channel on quite a bit.

    I cannot believe we both came up with trying the hula hoop again! (great minds) I have been aching to buy one for quite awhile and as you read in Bone's blog (and I replied to you there), I finally bit the bullet and bought one.

    I really thought it would be a piece of cake to get that baby spinning and I was horrified to find I had either totally lost my touch, or it is waaaaaay too big and that is the problem. I have got to see if it's me or the sphere, so I will indeed purchase the smaller one. Maybe we will have started a blog trend here!

    *picturing us both frantically swiveling our writhing torsos*

  • At 6/22/2006 07:17:00 AM, Blogger Sizzle said…

    i mistakenly thought you meant finger-nails when you were talking about nails (at first). thank goodness you cleared that up!

    do.not.watch.the.baby.story. scary shit! i can't watch that show (or the wedding show) because honestly? avoidance is a great technique i employ daily. ;)

  • At 6/22/2006 08:57:00 AM, Anonymous meanie said…

    I love the hula hoop. We were hooping it up just the other day. A few years ago some friends and I got addicted to hula hooping and we'd have contests where we'd put a beer on the counter and have to walk across the room, pick up the beer, chug and then walk back.

    it was super fun. you'll get it back in no time.

  • At 6/22/2006 12:23:00 PM, Blogger m a k i l a said…

    one of these days you need to ditch the history channel and i will ditch the learning channel and we can go to lunch with the baby!

  • At 6/22/2006 01:55:00 PM, Blogger Michael said…

    I did know about the thing with the nails, but I work with a carpenter so you pick these things up. As for the specials on booze, those are always interesting. I'm always hoping to see my great-grandparents on some film reel about the prohibition. They immigrated to the US from Quebec and would make apple jack (not to be confused with the cereal) like it was going out of style.

    I used to watch Mail Call a lot, when I watched a lot of TV. I'm not super interested in WWII or anything, I just really like R. Lee Ermey.

    I also used to like the dating shows on TLC (because they weren't trashy like Elimidate and crap like that), but then they were cancelled.

    You know, if you're learning, you're technically not wasting your time with television. If you really want to rot your brain, switch to something like E!-TV or VH1. :P

  • At 6/22/2006 10:47:00 PM, Blogger ocg said…

    Dr.K- Believe me I am working on it... I am sure the video will be along shortly... for sure.

    Circe- I went to my sister's and attempted to use the smaller hula I bought for my nephew.

    Apparently size does NOT matter for this particular endeavor. The smaller one seemed to make no difference.

    Practice makes perfect?

    Sizz- I was actually worried that it might get confused, but I thought the "fun fact" would clear that up.


    Avoidance is my life.

    Meanie- I am now going to head to SEA so you can give me some pointers. I would love to do the across-the-room-beer-chugging-fun... but at this point I will only be tripping over the hoop lying at my feet.

    Mak- School starts on Monday. Maybe on the weekend or Friday? Let's talk.

    Nameless- I will now be googling "apple jack".

    I am watching The History Channel as the E! channel sucks. me. in. Sad, really...

  • At 6/23/2006 05:23:00 AM, Anonymous thebrkfrychannel said…

    Gotta mix in a little A&E... Investigative Reports, American Justice, "IM BILL CURTIS!..."- C'mon- mafia, serial killers, psycho nut-bag jealous wives wielding knives and such, scandal, corruption... That Bill Curtis is hypnotic- could definitely spice up that nails story (or a hula hoop crime), I tell ya... "Here on A&E..."- JRL

  • At 6/23/2006 10:13:00 AM, Blogger Heather B. said…

    It's nice to know I'm not the only person who watches a Baby Story. Best form of birth control EVAH. Well, right up there with babysitting.

  • At 6/24/2006 11:24:00 AM, Blogger Nihilistic said…

    I actually have History Channel movies/documentaries coming to me from Netflix...I'm RENTING THEM!! Is this wrong? In some sense I know it is...

  • At 6/24/2006 01:13:00 PM, Blogger ocg said…

    TBC- Whenever I have watched A&E, it is featuring some murder investigation... but I will check it out a little closer.

    HB- Could. Not. Agree. More.

    Nih- Actually I am glad you mentioned that you were renting them. Many evenings I am not home to catch some of the shows I would like and I was just wondering the other day if they were available for rental.

    So, no, it's not wrong at all!

  • At 6/24/2006 08:15:00 PM, Blogger sage said…

    i use to watch the history channel,but found that after a few months, I was seeing the same programs over and over so I cancelled cable. But hula hooping to the history channel, that would be a mental and physical workout.


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